You Deserve It, Mama


Self-Care. It’s a word that gets thrown around a lot. We’re told it’s important and that we should make time for it. As a mother though, we are already balancing so many things – too many things! How are we supposed to make time for something else? Hence a lot of “self-care” suggestions for moms are things like “take a shower by yourself.” Now, as a mother, I fully agree that showering by yourself is good for the soul. However, showering by yourself is something that is taken for granted by the rest of the non-mothering world and the bottom line is, we deserve better. You deserve it, Mama.

So here are some real self-care ideas for busy mamas:

Schedule “You Time”

It can be hard to allow yourself the time to do something for yourself when you have a report due at work, your child’s soccer schedule is taking over your life, there’s a pile of laundry waiting in the basement, and everyone wants to know what’s for dinner. For myself, I find it is necessary to schedule myself breaks during the day. The length of time entirely depends on what you’ve got going on that day and whether you are working in the office or working at home as a full-time mama or something else. But at least set aside 15 min during the day (not before or after the kids go to bed) as your time. Amid all the demands placed on you, this is your time to stop and do whatever you want. You could read a book, scroll your phone, paint your nails, watch your favorite show, or make a snack – this is your time!

Start a Bullet Journal

I have found bullet journaling to be very therapeutic. The idea of a bullet journal (or bujo for short) is that it’s a one-stop shop. The notebook you choose holds anything and everything you want: your shopping lists, your list of TV shows you want to watch, your daily gratitudes, funny things your kid said, the schedule for your “you time” – there’s a spot in the bujo for all of it.

I have found that bullet journaling helps me track my emotions better and focus on the things I want to be doing while also not forgetting any of the things I need to be doing. Starting the day in my journal and reviewing it at night is a relaxing and re-focusing part of my AM and PM rituals. You can find bujo tips and tricks in a variety of places, but the official site is a good place to start.

Sign Yourself Up for an Activity

A lot of us spend a great deal of time and money taking our kids to various activities. But have you ever signed yourself up for one? This can be a great way to experience something new. And get yourself out of the house for time without kids. A lot of recreation departments offer a variety of classes for adults – from pickleball to hip-hop to yoga. A quick search in Google can bring up a variety of other options – clay, cooking, ballroom dancing, watercolor painting – and even pole fitness! A reliable provider of affordable, fun classes for adults is Assabet Valley Regional Technical. I have taken a variety of classes there including hand drumming, belly-dancing, and burlesque!

Treat Yo’ Self

Make a wish list folder on your phone or computer. Add items to your wish list as you find things you like while out shopping or browsing online. Then, once a month, schedule yourself a “wish list day.” Yes, put it on the calendar and make it official. On that day, you get to either choose one item from your wish list or my personal preference, close your eyes, and click on an item. Then treat yo’ self by adding that item to the cart and buying it! Doing this once a month will make sure you are not always putting off getting yourself something because of what everyone else needs and will also give you something to look forward to. I also like to do this with a “special lunch” once a month. I will add this to my calendar and, on that day, buy just myself lunch from wherever I want.

You Deserve it, Mama.

The first and most important step in developing a self-care routine is realizing that you are worthy of it. Don’t let society (or even yourself) beat you up about taking time to care for you. Remember, it isn’t selfish to take care of yourself. In fact, it is easier to be a better mother, partner, employee, friend, etc, when you feel good about yourself. Now go and schedule that you time. You deserve it, Mama.


  1. Kudos to providing great tips for moms to take self-care times for themselves to regroup and to ground themselves being the be all for their children and families.

    One idea I suggest is to take pockets of time such as five minutes here and there to just breath and refocus on yourself during a busy day. I do it every day as my son is now a teenager from day one when he was a baby. Another idea is to engage in an activity such as writing books and/or engaging in arts and crafts or physical activties to destress and reset yourself every day.


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