As we approach the end of 2023, many of us are already thinking about what the new year might bring. While I believe that any time is a good time to create intentions and reset priorities, the New Year is a collective moment of doing so. There is also a lot of noise at this time of year. New Year, New You, am I right? So while gyms lure us in with great deals, programs offer us a new way of living, and seemingly every article debates the mere idea of creating resolutions – I am here to offer a different way forward.
As a leadership coach, there is something that I believe to be true. What works for one person, works for one person. That is why I rarely believe in giving advice. What I do believe is sharing ideas and inspiration. I always encourage people to take what works for them and leave the rest. So as we prepare to enter the New Year, here are three approaches to consider.
A Yearly Theme
For the past nine years, I have crafted a yearly theme. I start my thought process around Thanksgiving, allowing ample time to make sure the words I choose feel right. I chose two words to guide me throughout the year. The theme is words that I come back to, in ways both big and small. In 2023, my theme was: nurture and build.
Heading into 2023, I knew that I would be facing major surgery. I wanted to consistently be thinking about how to nurture myself. This resulted in amplifying my yoga and meditation practice, deepening my work with MamaConnect, reading lots of novels, and so much more. The theme of build came into play as I applied for and began graduate school, curated a cohort of local entrepreneurs which I named BUILD, and spent a lot of time decluttering my home and building for the future. I’m still dreaming up what’s in store for 2024, and cannot wait to see where I land.
The Monthly Three
Moving into a new year can feel daunting. It can be hard to wrap our heads around planning for a full year. Excitement breeds ideas, yet putting them into practice in January does not always seem possible. A practice I have begun to implement is called “The Monthly Three”. As you sit down to plan your year, take out a piece of paper and create space for three activities/goals/intentions for each month. For example, for July 2024, I wrote down: Host our annual 4th of July Party, Camp in our Backyard, and Swim in the Ocean. For October 2024, I wrote: Visit Woodstock Vermont, Carve Pumpkins, and do a Family Photoshoot. This practice will allow you to capture fun ideas that come up now. You can return – and of course, edit – as the year goes on.
New Year’s Resolutions
While New Year’s Resolutions get a lot of shade, the reason is simple – statistically, most people are not able to sustain their resolutions. So instead of saying that you should not create them, I will share three critically important tips.
- Start with why
A common resolution is to work out more often. And that is a perfectly good resolution! Still, I want you to push to uncover your why, and dig as deep as you can. Perhaps you have chosen this resolution because you want to look better. If you go deeper, perhaps it is actually because you want to feel better. And, if you keep going deeper, you might realize that you want to be able to be as strong as possible to keep up with your kids, and in the future, their kids. Getting crystal clear on why we want to do something makes us more likely to do it. Whatever your resolution is, take time to consider your why. - Make a (realistic) plan
I am a big fan of a written plan. In fact, when we write down our plan, we are much more likely to achieve it. And when I say plan, I want you to get down to the nitty-gritty details. Using the above example of working out more often, this plan may include things like choosing a gym or at-home workout system, buying new sneakers, scheduling out realistic workouts for the next eight weeks, blocking out your calendar for workouts, planning child care, and so on. If you are making a resolution, make sure you have a solid plan. - Reframe consistency
Being consistent does not mean being perfect. So many times people are thrown off track when they miss a day, a week, or a month of progress on a goal they are working on. What consistency requires is continuously coming back to that goal, starting small, and continuing on – without getting caught up in guilt for not “doing better”. Give yourself a lot of grace, and keep moving towards the things you care most about – and, allow those things to change and evolve over time.
