There must be something in the air (okay, it’s totally just my daughter’s age), because I’ve been feeling so, super, beyond overstimulated the last couple of months by all the clattering of noises, incessant whining, constant needing, and over-the-top demanding that’s been spewed in my direction. I bet you can feel my feels about this season of life through the screen you’re reading on.
I’ve noticed that my own cup feels rather low lately. So when my two-and-a-half-year-old’s mood takes a turn (generally after my work day is done…great timing but she doesn’t know), I’m not quite prepared to handle it in the best way. Add on top of that my busy full-time work as a manager, a new family routine with our kids in different schools, and feeling like the house is in shambles… it’s all a recipe for stress.
Before I move on, can you relate to this situation?! The needs. The demands. The piling up of everything lately? Or… is it just me? Phew.
Anyway, with my almost threenager often being very extra, my threshold for stress has been tested a lot recently. My patience and capacity are lower. My attitude is a little off. I’m just feeling more irritable. I’ll admit it.
So, if you’ve been feeling like me — overstimulated and maxed out — these tips are for you.
The next time you’re feeling this way, try one or some of these steps when your kids have you feeling overstimulated:
Go for a walk.
I read that walking solves 93% of your problems. That doesn’t mean it erases what’s going on in your life but it gives you the space you need to “walk it out”, breathe, and get a change of scenery for that mood boost you might be needing. I aim to walk every day, even if it’s 5 minutes, but I usually go for at least 30 minutes. I can’t explain what it does to my whole being, but I generally feel lighter, less stressed, and happier after a light stroll.
Take 5 (or 10 or 15).
If I’m feeling edgy or at my limit with my kids, I’ll literally tap out (lol) and ask my husband for some time alone in our room. I’ll legitimately lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling, and regroup. It’s often just the silence and space I need from tiny hands touching and needing me. Deep breaths. This is also a good time to try a meditation, listen to calming music or repeat a positive affirmation (“I am calm” “I am a great mom” “I deserve breaks”).
Have a self-care moment.
If I feel my cup emptying during a particularly hard week or month, I often know it’s because I’ve had zero quality time with myself. If I can swing it, I’ll try to get out alone and do something that feels good and/or feeds my soul: a little shop, a pedicure, a massage, a meet-up with a friend for coffee, or a movie. Self-care can look so different depending on what you need, what you have time for, and what kind of childcare you have available. Oftentimes, it’s a face mask in front of the TV. Whatever it looks like, it feels good to just tune into your own needs and carve out time to focus on yourself instead of someone else.
Explain how you’re feeling.
Sometimes we just need to level with our kids. They’re young but they’re so in tune with us and aware when something seems off. Tell them, “Mommy’s feeling frustrated.” “Mommy is a little more tired today.” “Mommy needs some time alone upstairs, but will be back.”
It’s okay for kids to see their parents vulnerable and honest. We are human, too. We’re allowed to have a range of feelings — and our kids will only learn from us that it’s okay to go through what you’re going through.
I love my spicy little girl. She is assertive and feisty. Tough and brave. There’s nothing I’d change about her, ever, and I truly love that she exudes such a mature level of confidence and power at her young age…
But, for reals, your girl needs a break. So, I’ll take one. And well, you should, too.
